MeliGoesRogue

Day 4-
I had every intention of waking this morning with the sun…it was a great intention but my sleep proved to be a worthy contender. I was leaving Stonehaven today and all that was left was Dunnottar. I finished my breakfast which Anne called pathetic, as it was missing sausage, tomatoes and a bit of black pudding. I bid my far wells and promised to return even if I didn't know when that day would be. I headed to the cliff which house my first castle and its ruins. Out of the car park I could feel the familiar mist of the ocean welcoming me here to her side. I took the scarf from my neck and wrapped it around my head. I moved down the gravel path keeping close to the sides and allowing all those families to float past me. Of course as you know I of course spotted the stream running down one of the sides. Was a side note Scotland is full of these, these incredible mountains that seem like just grass and rock have these wonderful cracks all over that allow the water to find its way down. Its one of my favorite things to seen in a landscape. I love how the earth was made to do all these things that we as men try to recreate.

Once I lifted my eyes she revealed herself to me. The day was dark and cloudy but just like mountains open up for the water to flow the sky opened up a just a bit to allow the sun to shine over this small piece of land that I had come so far to see. The lingered there on the mainland watching over her for a little bit, the path below that led to her was steep and full of those families, besides she was best from up here…for now.

Now of course Jamie who had followed the trail with me nestled up against the wild daisies while I stood still in the silent high above. He looked so cute resting down there and truthfully I had to send his soon to be mother photos showing he was still alive.

Soon it was time to go, sooner than I wanted but so many other places laid on the road ahead. I returned to my car fighting all the late sleepers who were just arriving. For the most part I had planned every bit of this trip before I stepped one foot outside of my house, but I had learned in Ireland that sometimes plans change and I needed to be ok with that. This time they changed for the better, I made the right hand turn up that typical one way road towards Drum Castle. It wasn't on my original itinerary but it was a welcome addition. I went up the long winding road until just from behind the cover of the trees she appeared.
Entryways are for me the most important part of a home or castle if your so lucky. Even thought the dark clouds had followed me she still welcomed me in.

There was no tour of the castle so visitors were left to their own paths and assumptions. So I made my way over the side of the castle under the watchful eye of the large pine tree.I followed the path till its end and found the cows roaming quietly in the distance. Jamie insisted on a picture…this literally happened every where on this trip. I swear I should have gotten him a selfie stick. After I snapped his pic he decided to stay on the lawn while I explored.

To the left of the castle there was a beautiful wooded area which is where I headed. As I neared it I could see the wide stone steps leading to what seemed to be a little outhouse. As I got closer I saw the cross on its roof.

We sat on the bench in front of the church for a bit, being the contemplative nostalgic that I am known to be. The quiet that this country life afford me is a genuine luxury I take advantage of each chance I get. We moved into the woods and found a moss covered tree branch that had been weighed down and was low enough to sit upon. The darkness afforded me cover for the tears that involuntarily flowed from my eyes. Every moment that I allowed my mind to clear it was filled with the realization that I was here..leaving a dream. It was time for my fairy tale to continue, and it certainly did…

Once upon a time there was a girl, a girl who dreamed of traveling the world and being a writer. Once upon a time this girl's dreams came true. I found myself in the middle of a country I had longed to see standing in front of the castle that inspired my favorite fairy tale. No I will say that the old adage that "Dreams come true" I feel its not entirely an accurate statement, they don't just come to be they are typically the result of labor and great sacrifice.

In my young age I have lived quite a bit of life, I've worked in many different places, known many different people, loved and lost just more than is fair. The dream to travel sprouted in a moment of incredible darkness. Could this life really be the same every where. I had assumed that just as time can change experience surely environment would be as crucial as circumstance. But I was too young to go as far as I wanted so I settled for being a mother to someone else's children in a different state far from my own. That life experience altered so much of me in more ways than I prefer to admit. There are very few things I blame on ML, there are more things I reluctantly learned but that have helped me accepting the faults in others. Below some pics of Jamie and I with our favorite castle and yup it is pink!

After our moment of reflection gazing out into the fields of colors- Jamie and I set sail to our new home. Finally we would lay our head in the heart of the Highlands. Perhaps we would find some stones to fall through time but even if we didn't the air would be different. The journey would prove difficult for my 4 cylinder rental as we were forced to ascend some great heights. The road had been winding on the edge of a some cliffs for some time when soon before me I could see the road I was on going vertical.

The fear of not making it up was the price I would have to pay for a highland life and I was a willing participant. On the way up the car would go past 32mph which meant the cars behind me grew impatient. However they are for the most part patient and kind so I received no honks or impatient gestures, Perhaps they had once struggled the way I was and felt sympathy. I finally made it up the hill. I stopped at the top to marvel at the great distance and heights I had reached. Finally the quiet found me as I the wind whipped my hair against my face. There was only a moment to spare so I returned to the roads looking only for the bed that would warm me and the bath that would release me. I arrived an hour later grateful to find a fire burning and a glass of wine calling. I said farewell to Isobel and quickly drew my attention to the white tub which has been the driving force after about 14:30 that afternoon.

Well its about that time, as you can see sitting on that wooden log is the first drink of the night which means the things left are my own. I will say this though. One of the things truly interesting that I have seen on this trip is how many people actually hitch hike. I probably could have made this trip long ago if I didn't care about where I rested my head or how I would even get anywhere, but the truth is there is no adventure in that for me. It's not that I require luxury (although I kinda do) its more that the trip is not only about the places I see but the condition of my soul when I see them. Taking a bath and processing the day, a nice fire and arm chair to cuddle in after my feet have given all they have and finally a warm bed where maybe just maybe I can actually sleep for longer than 2 hours at a time, these are all part of how much I can and will appreciate the beauty that surrounds me. Anyway, this post took so much longer than some of the others, partly because it's days later and partly because a handsome stranger on the train to London today created the place for my mind to wander. Let's just say I can write my own 50 shades of grey, but I wont…mama wont let me.

Good Night those who are still here, I might not know where you are when you read this or if they do anything to your soul, but the truth is this is about me finally pushing out instead of down.